About Calamity Jane's Hamburger Parlor:

located in Sandy Oregon
Gateway to Mt. Hood

Calamity Jane's Hamburger Parlor has been open in Sandy Oregon for a long time, and along the way we have earned the complements of many patrons. We are glad to proudly serve the residents of Sandy and the surrounding area as well as provide a warm meal for those coming down from a chilly day playing in the snow.

Next time your in our neck of the wood's come and give us a try. We have world famous hamburgers and plenty of other choices. In fact we are an excellent place to get a burger, and enjoy a great atmosphere. Good place to get a group of friends together. Large portions and a huge variety of burgers. Ask any one in town and we are sure they would recommend us to anyone who wants a good burger.

Calamity Jane's Hamburger Parlor

42015 SE HWY 26

Sandy, Or 97055


503.668.7817

What Others Have to Say

Anyway back to the story. This is a bigger is better place and their burgers come in 1/3, 2/3, and full pound denominations. I was feeling demure so I ordered the city slicker sized (1/3 lb) Pepperoni pizza burger. This comes with a bun, burger, pepperoni, olives, mozzarella cheese, and tomato sauce. Already sensing a challenge to my girlish figure I get the salad side and their refillable jumbo diet coke. While I get my salad and diet coke there is a mix up in the kitchen that would prove to be my undoing. Somewhere between me saying I wanted a small burger and that burger getting made I ended up with the Ranch Hand (full pound). As you can see from the picture this thing is a monster. That is a full size steak knife sticking out of it and all you can see is the handle.

Slightly stunned I start to dig in. There is a layer of cheese between each 1/3 pound patty which converts this from a large but tasty treat to a gut bomb. Three 1/3 pound patties done to the other side of well done that appear to be straight out of a freezer. Good thing I have the super tanker diet coke. After making some little progress I realize if I have any chance of getting out alive I am going to have to jettison some of this meat. Ripping out the two most over cooked patties I am left with a reasonable burger which actually tasters pretty good when my mouth is not full of burger patty. I like to think I limped out of their with my dignity but I am afraid that is a sham.

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